“Oh, have a go, mate,” spat Johnno Brooks (32), employee at Johnno & Sons Builders, as he watched another white-collar smart alec try to pass off as a genuine member of the high-vis brigade.

******

Chippy Johnno Brooks (23), employee of Johnno & Sons Builders and son of Johnno Brooks (50), says his recent discovery at his local Jetts Fitness was “unnerving” and “rattled [him] to the core”.

It was as a mid-20s man stretched out on the bench press that his Chicago Bulls jersey lifted to reveal, to Johnno’s upset, a suspiciously sculpted lower core but, more alarmingly, the elastic band of the man’s fluoro yellow Tradie briefs.

Johnno’s long-time friend, and QUT accounting major identified “that wanker” as a UQ journalism student. We are yet to track down the man, but the damage has been done — Johnno cannot believe those outside his professional circle would lay claim to underwear clearly not built for them.

“The fact that these non-tradie dickheads would parade around is outrageous and misleading,” he said. “It’s fraud! Blatant, daylight fraud! You don’t see me hitting the Valley in Jockey undies, do ya?”

No more to come.