Thomas Harrington-Lewis (22), a Winter clerk at Brighton & Hewitt Shallesons, one of Eagle St’s premier firms, has today announced that, in his learned opinion, ‘...working at a firm is absolutely nothing like Suits, that show was so unrealistic.’

This is despite the fact he is genuinely convinced Grey’s Anatomy was a perfect representation of hospitals, and Brooklyn Nine-Nine is an accurate, if humorous, take on police culture in New York.

Two weeks in winter vacation clerkships, it seems Brisbane’s bright young clerks are beginning to get a little chirpy. The first-week nerves have been replaced with second-week confidence, and this has been reflected in Thomas’ bold claim.

‘To be honest, Suits was just bullshit through and through,’ he informed us, conveniently ignoring that, much like a good 50% of current law students, he chose to study law because he ‘wanted to be Harvey Specter… man, he’s cool.’

‘Working in an actual firm, particularly one as prestigious as Brighton & Hewit Shallesons, really highlights how the writers of Suits dumbed down the complex and rigorous work of commercial lawyers. I’m working harder than Mike Ross, and I’m just a clerk!’

Thomas’ newfound elitism over television programmes like Suits has unfortunately not extended to a broader realisation that TV is fictional. When we picked his brains over other workplace shows, he refused to believe they were anything short of documentary-like accuracy.

‘Mate, Grey’s Anatomy is a masterpiece. My friend’s mum is a GP, and she watches it, so… you really shouldn’t have any doubts.’

‘And don’t even get me started on how Orange Is The New Black is a hauntingly accurate depiction of women’s prisons.’

With two weeks left to run in his clerkship, let’s hope Thomas will eventually come to understand that scripted television shows are fictional, and shouldn’t govern the decisions he make.

Fuck, Harvey Specter is cool though.