At age 20, Commerce/Law student Ryan Abrahams has the cardiac health of a 48-year-old, and the overall health of a struggling 36-year-old with consistent cholesterol issues.

Countless weeks of drinking to excess, eating rubbish food, and doing genuinely no exercise have taken their toll on Ryan’s body.

These past few weeks, he has experienced sharp, shooting pains on the left side of his chest, and regular episodes of struggling to breathe, often after walking up a flight of stairs.

But according to Ryan, these honestly frightening symptoms has left him in the emotional state of ‘...to be honest, not too stressed about it mate.’

‘I’m a young man, I’ll bounce back from anything. I’ve had four hours sleep this week, and to be honest, I feel great.’

The Obiter’s medical advisors suggest not only is Ryan suffering from aggressive cardiac issues, but also from a condition known in the medical community as ‘being absolutely fucking in denial.’ Such a condition will render otherwise fairly intelligent and capable youth into ignoring every symptom their body is screaming at them, in favour of the unhealthy practices they adore.

With his 21st birthday on the horizon, Ryan’s body continues to age rapidly at the rate of one day per day. Whilst his family are a little concerned about his health, his father, Scott, proudly told us ‘...he’s an Abrahams. He’ll shake it off. The kid’ll be okay.’

We reached Ryan for a second interview, but three sentences in, he began a lethal coughing fit which made us genuinely afraid.

We wish him the best. Lord knows, he will need it.