You have to hit true rock bottom to turn it around, and for one Brisbane local, it seems he is right on the cusp.

‘Gee, you wonder whether the Melbourne Stars have peaked too early,’ said local sad-case and cricket tragic, Lachie Watson (24), as his silly season shenanigans have rapidly given way to being weirdly invested in the BBL Finals.

Perhaps consecutive weekends of long lunches, tall beers, and becoming desperately well-acquainted with the toilet bowl of his sharehouse for both gastroenterological and alcohol-related causes have caused this young man to do a bit of soul-searching.

But while soul-searching for some usually leads them to read ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ or ‘The Barefoot Investor,’ for Lachie, it seems that soul-searching has led him to invest far too much of his time, energy, and self-worth in the trials and tribulations of franchise Twenty20 cricket teams.

Whilst Lachie would usually stand by the water-cooler at his management consultancy firm, McNicholls & West, discussing such relatable topics as ‘the bushfires’ and ‘how the coronavirus sounds like a beer,’ he now can’t be budged from in-depth analyses of the failures of AB De Villiers, and full-throated adoration of the Sixers putting together a terrific finals run despite their lack of any notable stars.

Lachie’s friends, a mis-shapen collection of school mates and work acquaintances, have expressed mild concern, although their lack of surprise seems to indicate this isn’t the first time their friend has developed an odd obsession.

‘Last summer he became deeply invested in the lore of The Hunger Games,’ stated Travis Bentley (25), a schoolmate who hangs around because Lachie can still be ‘a bit of a laugh.’

‘Wouldn’t shut up about Panem and everything. Very strange.’

More to come on this rapidly developing story on the plight of the young Australian man.