‘I just think it unnecessarily reinforces the subjugation of women,’ said Leif Copperthrone, a local blacksmith-turned-warrior, in response to the desperate pleadings of the wizard Riane.

‘But she has genuinely been kidnapped, and the king needs your help--’ suggested Riane, describing the current situation with a surprisingly blunt tone for a wizard trained in the mystic arts of Magick (as this is a fantasy situation, many words are similar to ours, but just slightly mis-spelt).

As Leif had just been told, the Crown Princess of the Regallson lands had been kidnapped by foot soldiars (that’s how they spell it) from the rival land of Cronsson. Whilst travelling, her convoy was attacked and the Princess summarily taken away, to be held for ransom.

‘In all honesty, Riane, it feels like you might have contrived this situation so I can learn more about myself, rather than this actually being about the rescue of a princess. Thoughts?’ inquired Leif, showing a rare understanding of narrative structure well beyond his years.

The exasperated wizard, with his trick pretty quickly revealed, shrugged his head.

‘Lord Copperthrone, the time has come to reveal something deep from your past… you are the son of Sintor.’

The complete lack of surprise on Leif’s face was enough to indicate to Riane that something was slightly awry.

‘I know,’ came back the blunt response. ‘Obviously,’ Leif followed up, before landing the effective killer blow of ‘This is clearly why you’ve asked me to embark on this quest.’

With not a hell of a lot left in his arsenal, the Magick-user bowed his head and made his exit, before offering some final words of wisdom.

‘Darkness is comin-’ began the wizard before being immediately cut off with ‘yep, well aware darkness is coming.’

Wow. Heck of a lot of news coming out of the magic realm. What a great idea for an article, thankfully we took the time to write and publish this objectively fantastic idea.

No more to come.