With an eye on reconnecting with Queensland voters following Saturday’s disastrous election loss in which the party was swept away across much of the state, the Australian Labor Party National Executive have unveiled today a powerful new plan to design, cast and direct a bold and provocative avant-garde anti-Adani interpretive dance performance to play at Powerhouse in New Farm for three exclusive nights this June.

The dance performance, featuring a troupe of silent, malnourished ballet dancers contorting themselves under harsh red lights to represent Earth’s apocalyptic post-global warming future, will seek to re-connect with Queensland voters and their progressive political concerns.

A special guest appearance by popular political commentator and Young Australian Muslim of the Year, Yassmin Abdel-Magied, will highlight Labor’s renewed commitment to the heartland and understanding Queensland voters.

In an exclusive for The Obiter, National Secretary Noah Carroll discussed the plan with us.

‘We’re hoping to make up the ground we lost with Queensland voters this election, in which we won just one seat between the Brisbane River and Cape York, by introducing them to brave, experimental art that will force them to critically reflect on their fucking stupid dumb-cunt vote on the weekend. God, I fucking hate the general public.’

Tickets will start at $450 per night, and the show will be marketed towards the close-minded, backwards and parochial Queenslanders that voted against their own direct interests on Saturday.

Labor have not yet confirmed whether Greens Councillor Jono Sri will appear in a show of left wing unity to deliver a spoken word poem in that fucking scarf he always wears.

More to come.