Wow. You talk about courage, you think of the ANZACs, single mothers, and the producers of Green Book. But in an act of unprecedented bravery and self-sacrifice, a straight, white, male second-year Arts/Commerce student has just offered to ‘play Devil’s Advocate’ in his Indigenous Politics & Policy tute.
Jeremy Foxwood (19) was excited to attend his first tute for POLS2101 Indigenous Politics & Policy, relishing the opportunity to share in other’s ideas, learn, and foster intellectual development through listening to peers.
But disaster struck just five minutes into the tute. Amidst a preliminary discussion of the issues facing Indigenous Australians in rural communities, Jeremy rapidly realised that a key part of the debate was missing.
A Devil’s Advocate.
The tute room was filled to the brim with the rising din of voices agreeing that the dispossession of Indigenous Australians from their native lands has contributed greatly to the issues faced today. And as Jeremy’s ears filled with people agreeing with each other, he felt sick to the stomach.
For it seemed as if no-one else would do the unthinkable. No-one else had the moral fibre, the courage, the conviction, the calm temperament, to fulfil the role that everyone so desperately needed, but no-one was willing to do.
So, voice trembling, revealing a nervousness that was only quelled by Jeremy muttering to himself ‘clear eyes, full heart, can’t lose,’ Jeremy raised his hand, and hurled himself onto the grenade.
‘Look, if I could just play Devil’s Advocate for a moment…’
Those eleven words, in a flash, had rescued an entire tute from the dark grips of going seven minutes without having a private-educated white chap play Devil’s Advocate. As Jeremy channelled the advocate for the Devil, proposing that a ‘lack of personal responsibility,’ and ‘biologically-lower IQs’ were responsible for the plight of Indigenous Australians, his fortunate classmates breathed an enormous sigh of relief.
The fields of Villers-Bretonneux are littered with the fallen, who gave their lives in noble self-sacrifice. And the carpet of Michie Building Room 209 is now forever infused with Jeremy’s bravery. As the SJWs rapidly turned on him, in their ‘screeching, hysterical manner’ (as was later reported in Jeremy’s final letter to his loved ones), he accepted his fate, knowing that he had fulfiled his duty.
The time has come to salute a legend.
So, to every noble white guy in a POLS tute who volunteers to play Devil’s Advocate, thank you. Thank you a million times over.
So much more to come from these impressive young men.