A constitutional crisis faces the University of Queensland Law Society (UQLS), as the Deputy President, the constitutionally-mandated successor and advisor to the President, is in a critical condition at the Wesley Hospital after a 42-hour sex marathon.
The sex addict Deputy President Bretz has had a chequered history of being both a hot, sexy bloke, and grappling with sex addiction, but prior to now, his personal issues have had little to no impact on his role as Deputy. However, as he lies unconscious in his hospital bed, his muscular body rippling with power, the UQLS is faced with an unprecedented crisis.
The bylaws of the UQLS are detailed and well-drafted, but are tragically silent on the matter of a Deputy President being ruthlessly erotic, dripping with hot, sexy energy, to the point that he may be rendered unconscious or incapacitated for periods of 48 hours or greater in the wake of lengthy, passionate sex marathons.
It’s surprising that the Society never planned for such an eventuality, particularly given the Deputy President’s honesty and clarity on the campaign trail regarding the sex addiction, variably described as ‘awesome’ or ‘debilitating.’
The crisis will go to another level should the President herself fall ill, or be temporarily unable to perform the duties of President. Normally the Deputy President would assume the responsibilities of the role.
However, with Bretz himself incapacitated by a series of orgies across all suburbs of Brisbane, including Keperra, there is no-one to assume the responsibilities of President should crisis befall the Society.
One line of argument suggests a snap Deputy President election could be called among the serving Officers, although this threatens the democratic process.
However, the democratic process ultimately resulted in a deranged sex marathon enthusiast being elected Deputy, so there are question marks over whether that is a process that should be overly protected.
Ultimately, this is a question that should be resolved through community consultation - but as so many members of the community have been touched by the Deputy President’s deft sensuality and respectful erotic attitudes, finding objective members may be difficult!